You're not bored are you? Bored of talking about women's style of leadership? This is a blog to help women in leadership after all. Well, you may not be tired of it, but I think that I am…so this series of posts will end with us talking about how God created us with...
Emotional intelligence: When I read about emotional intelligence in an article about women leaders it was a new term for me. So I had to look it up. This is what I found it means. It’s the capacity to be aware of, control, and express one's emotions, and to handle interpersonal relationships. EQ is more important than IQ; it’s the key to both personal and professional success. And guess what girls…God gave this to us. It’s huge! EQ gives you the ability to understand and manage emotions in positive ways to relieve stress, communicate effectively, empathize with others, overcome challenges, and defuse conflict. It helps us to be empathetic and responsive. It affects your performance at work, your physical health, your mental health, and your relationships.
Downside: Moody. Yes we are. It’s the price of us being created with intense emotions. And it’s one of the biggest complaints that men have against women leaders. To improve our emotional intelligence, and our decision-making abilities, we need to understand and manage our emotions. And managing our emotions starts with our thoughts.
Solution: Positive Framing. Positive framing leads to exceptional leadership in women. It provides the energy and clarity to keep moving ahead no matter what the difficulty. Leaders who implement positive framing see the facts clearly; it keeps negative feelings from distorting their view of reality. People are motivated by the positive far more than the negative. People are far more likely to be spurred to action by a vision of a positive outcome than they are to avoid a negative one. Still not sure what positive framing is? Answer this: Is the glass half full or half empty? How does seeing it one way frame everything else you later decide about both glass and water? Would seeing it the other way change your view? This is not new agey…this is Biblical.
Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things. Phil 4:8 NIV
We’re not just talking about positive thinking here. We’re talking about looking at a situation from God’s perspective instead of your own; stepping back and seeing the big picture.
The inability to positively frame difficult situations creates leaders to mistake temporary situations for a lasting and permanent situation. Women can see setbacks as mistakes and failure, and they can find themselves spiraling down, taking the emotional plunge that saps the energy they need to take action. Women tend to ruminate on difficulties and get stuck in a cycle of thought. Over-thinking a situation is toxic and interferes with a personals ability to solve problems and lead effectively.
Successful women leaders learn to reframe events and deal effectively with their emotions. They remain centered and in control when faced with obstacles, chaos and adversity. Positive framing is about finding alternative solutions and learning to “work around” something, or even creating an entirely new strategy. Instead of getting stuck in a swirl of negative emotions, that can only spiral downwards, a woman leader can reframe the situation in light of God’s purposes, and find the positive way of dealing with it.
Oh there are more female attributes that make us great leaders; stuff like taking the initiative, nurturing, recognizes the need for self-development, empathy, responsive, integrity, and drive. But I think that we’ve made the point today. Girls, God made you to be a leader. You don’t have to be apologetic, or try to emulate the character traits of men. Just be the woman that God created you to be and you’ll do fine. You’ll need to develop strengthen and actually use the leadership qualities that God has given you, but you’ll do fine.